Funny Jokes Blog

Customer: Why is this sandwich half eaten? Waiter: I didn’t have time to finish it.

Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup? Waiter: Probably learning to read.

What would you get if you crossed a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite !

Did you hear about the witch who fed her pet vulture on sawdust? The vulture laid ten eggs and when they hatched, nine chicks had wooden legs and the tenth was a woodpecker.

A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, “Never mind, I’ll do it myself,” and he lets her, and she gets mad, and he says, “Now what are you mad about? ” says, “If you don’t know I’m not going to tell you.”

What did the snake say when another asked him the time ? Don’t asp me !

What’s the favorite subject of young witches at school? Spelling.

Bob and Tom both like to golf. One day Bob went to Tom and said, “Hey look at this great ball!” Tom replied, “What’s so great about it? ” Bob said, “Well if you lose it, it will beep until you find it, and if it goes into the water it will float. […]

Why are vampires like false teeth? They all come out at night.

What do you get if you cross a glow-worm with a python? A twenty-foot-long strip-light that can squeeze you to death.