Funny Jokes Blog

Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft declaring emergency about two hours ago ? Pilot: Negativ, Sir. It’s only the same pilot.

“Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees..” “But Center, we are at 35,000 feet, how much noise can we make up here? ” “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 707 makes when it hits a 727? ”

There were three guys in an airplane. One guy dropped a rock, another dropped a brick, and the last dropped a grenade. When they got back on the ground they were walking down the street and they saw a woman crying. Being the gentlemen they are they went up to ask her why she was […]

Tower: Lufthansa 893, you’re number one, check for workers on the taxiway. Pilot: Roger ….. We’ve checked, they’re all working.

A young lady was conducting a study in to human sexual behavior. She came to the conclusion that the best place to find participants for the survey would be the airport. After three hours of questioning passengers, she sees a pilot walking to his gate. Having heard of the reputation of pilots she stops him […]

A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window. A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep. The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he’s afraid to wake the big guy up […]

How does the captain know the aircraft is safely at the ramp? Both the engines and the co-pilot stop whining.

Cessna: “Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel.” Tower: “Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight? !? !!” Cessna: “Uh…tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is.”

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a […]

Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural America. Panic stricken the Secret Service mobilized and descended on the farm in force. When they got there, the wreckage was clear. The aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hulk left smoldering in a tree line that bordered a farm. Secret Service descended […]