Funny Jokes Blog

Did you hear about the University of Miami fullback who stayed up all night studying for his urine test?

Tad answered the Tennessee State frat house phone. “Hi,” said the voice, “this is Rollie. Come on over, we’re having a real wildass party.” “Shit, Ah’d shore love to,” said Tad, “but Ah got me a bad case of gonorrhea.” “Bring it along!” answered Rollie. “The way thangs is goin’, mah […]

What do you get if you cross a student and an alien ? Something from another universe -ity !

Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

How does a New York University psychology major turn on his lights in the morning? By opening the car door.

Mrs. McKenzie was showing Corbett, the contractor, through the second floor of her new house to show him what colors to paint the rooms. “I’d like the bathroom done in white!” Corbett walked over to the window and shouted, “Green up! Green up!” “I want the bedroom in blue!” continued the woman. […]

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. “In English,” he said, “A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.” A voice from the back of the […]

Q: What do college students and deer have in common? A: They both stand in the middle of the road and stare at your headlights.

A son is calling his mom from college, and telling her that he had just got his degree. The mother says: That’s great honey! What kind of degree? And the son, almost squealing with excitement says: The best one ever, a Celsius degree!

Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby stork. The baby stork is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. “Don’t worry, son. Your mother will come back. She’s only bringing people babies and making them happy.” The next night, it’s father’s turn to do the job. […]