Funny Jokes Blog

What diploma do criminals get? The third degree.

Why are burglars such good tennis players ? Because they spend such a lot of their time in courts !

Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles? So he could break out.

What kind of thief steals meat? A hamburglar.

What’s another word for a murderer who kills old ladies? A Killergran.

The criminal mastermind found one of his gang sawing the legs off his bed. “What are you doing that for? ” demanded the crook boss. “Only doing what you ordered,” said the stupid thug. “You told me to lie low for a bit!”

A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off. “Shall I run and get it for you? ” asked the prisoner obligingly. “You must think I’m daft,” said the officer. “You stand here and I’ll get it.”

A boy is in a prison cell with no windows and no doors: there are no holes in the ceiling or trapdoors in the floor, yet in the morning the jailers find him gone. How did he get out ? Through the doorway - there were no doors remember !

It was Rocky’s first night in the penitentiary. All of the inmates were in their cells and he was trying to become a bit more comfortable with his meager surroundings. As he leaned against the bars at the front of his cell, Rocky heard a voice call out “44″ and the whole cell block erupted […]

An English prisoner of war was held by the Germans. The Englishman was shot all over the place, and okay until one day when the German told him, “Englander,your arm is infected with gangrene vee must cut it off.” The English prisoner said, “Well, okay, but could you drop it over England when you […]