Funny Jokes Blog

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years. The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking […]

How many Borderline P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb? Just one. To threaten suicide if you don’t change it for him/her.

A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds when he entered a patient’s room. He found Patient #1 sitting on the floor, pretending to saw a piece of wood in half. Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet. The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was […]

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it takes nine visits.

What’s the difference between a psychologist and a magician? A psychologist pulls habits out of rats!

A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting. Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence. Calling out to the patient, the man says, “Pardon me, sir, but do […]

Doctor, Doctor, I think I’m a bridge. What’s come over you? Oh, two cars, a large truck and a coach.

A guy had been feeling down for so long that he finally decided to seek the aid of a psychiatrist. He went there, lay on the couch, spilled his guts then waited for the profound wisdom of the psychiatrist to make him feel better. The psychiatrist asked me a few questions, took some […]

One out of every four people is suffering from some form of mental illness. Check three friends. If they’re OK, then it’s you.

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? “Why does the light bulb necessarily have to change? ”